It’s been more than a week since my last update. In that time Minnesota has seen the total number of confirmed cases of COVID-19 shoot up to 441. (Incidentally, I learned on a podcast that COVID-19 stands for COronaVIrus Disease number 19, which means we’ve already seen at least 18 other coronaviruses and their subsequent illnesses come and go.) Minnesota has also experienced our first deaths, with a current total of 5, as of last night. During one of his updates this week, Gov. Tim Walz, who went into self-quarantine himself after contact with a staffer who had tested positive, made the optimistic claim that the social distancing efforts of Minnesotans has made a difference, and the virus is spreading more slowly here than it is in other areas. The catch to this was his follow-up statement — that we’re too far past the point of no return when it comes to flattening the curve, and we’re going to experience a peak. The best he is hoping for now is that we stretch that number out enough to keep from running out of available beds necessary to treat the critical cases. I mean, that’s the reality of where we are now, but how grim is that….
He made two other significant statements at that same press conference: 1) The state is now on a shelter-in-place lockdown for two weeks, and 2) schools statewide are closed through May 4th. I’d already been back at school and engaged in some of the most comically surreal tasks of my career at that point, so closing was no surprise. Only going as far as May 4th? That was unexpected. I don’t believe this means he expects things to all be resolved and back on a healing path by a date of his choosing — any kind of political leader to even flirt with an idea like that would have to be an absolute, glow-in-the-dark moron. I think he’s hoping that having us on distance learning for what amounts to the month of April will help slow the spread. Beyond that? All we can do these days is take what’s in front of us then see what happens, which is all I feel comfortable saying on the subject for now.
During this uniquely busy week when I didn’t post any updates, I was back at school working on some of the most unusual tasks I wouldn’t have dreamed possible even two months prior: Staff meetings held by video conference, bagging up the contents of student desks and lockers while wearing latex gloves, planning on having an entire week to wrap things up before distance learning started then finding out at the end of the second day teachers were being sent home for our own safety. That was the tipping point for me, when everything became real. When our principal announced that I had a painful chill surge through my body, then spent the following hour in a hazy panic.
So I’m decidedly locked down into self-isolation now. I’m comfortably supplied up and have more food in my house than I’ve probably ever had at one time before, which is to say I have what would amount to a normal amount of food for a responsible adult who doesn’t have thirty-four places within a mile of his house where he can buy a sandwich whenever he feels like it. It’s helped this weekend that the weather has been cold and windy and wet so there isn’t much reason to leave the house anyway.
Being an off-the-charts introvert, I don’t have much problem being by myself, but even I can reach an isolation breaking point; being introverted is not the same thing as being anti-social or misanthropic, after all. When I went back to school this past Friday to work my shift of returning bags of supplies to the families picking them up, I was very aware it would be the last day in a good long time I’d be seeing any people at all, much less many of the people important to me.
I suspect April will prove to feel like a very long month. I’m hoping to take advantage of all this time at home to clean and organize and do a hundred other things I’m great about procrastinating around, but I’m sure there’s going to be plenty of time killing recreation going on as well. The one thing I know for sure is that I’ll be throwing myself into this distance learning experiment. Keeping involved with my school work isn’t just going to be a responsibility, but one of the things I expect will keep me centered. In the end, it might be one of the few aspects of my life this month over which I’m going to have any control.
Sunday, March 29, 2020
Friday, March 20, 2020
Pandemic Narrative, Part 3
Since Sunday, the great state of Minnesota has gone from 35 to 115 confirmed cases. I emphasize confirmed because it’s impossible to say exactly how widespread the virus is right now, with minimal testing performed and available. I’m not blaming our government for this, or at least not our state government. Minnesota governor Tim Walz has proven his quality several times over since this crisis began.
I’m looking out my window at two of my neighbors, both seniors, at getting their mail. It’s obvious they know each other and have stopped to chat for a moment — thankfully from about 10 feet apart. What the hell with this natural world, making us behave this way just to keep from getting sick and possibly dying.
I told some colleagues before break started that I’d consider it a win if I made it all through our time off and only left the house five times or fewer. Not to walk the dog or get the mail, but actually hopped in the car and went somewhere. It feels like I brought this up in an earlier post already, but whatever. I started break getting myself plenty stocked up and still feel I’m ready to stay home and indoors for a good long while, but things are beginning to look like this is going to extend past a good long while and stretch into becoming a bad long while. Which probably means I’ve got at least one more grocery run at some point. Or would it be better to take advantage of all the take out or delivery choices from restaurants while that’s still a choice? I won’t be surprised if we eventually go into a statewide lockdown, but I think we still have time before we reach that benchmark. Is takeout worth the risk? Is it any less safe than going to a grocery store during off hours? Too many things to think about that really have never been a part of our lives before.
The biggest news has been the influx of email coming from the school district and my principal recently. Included in this has been the first indication we’ve been given of what we’ll be doing next week when we report back to work again. No kids, which is great, and all meetings and work keeping us as isolated as possible. I’ve been out for a week and haven’t gotten sick, so I’m hoping that means there isn’t any virus waiting for me in my classroom when I return, and since my room is at the end of a hallway and right by an exit, I should be able to minimize contact pretty effectively.
One of the worst things about this for me so far has been this holding pattern. When I get faced with some kind of a problem, I usually want it solved right away, and if I don’t know what I need to do to begin that process, it’s really frustrating. At least now I have some direction and will be able to keep my head productively occupied for the weekend.
In a way this week has been like a winter storm hitting, in the sense that you’re pretty much stuck at home because going anywhere, unless you really have to, isn’t an option. I’ve always enjoyed that to a degree, since I can keep to my introverted self and recharge in the quiet without feeling guilty about going out and doing something.
I have a feeling that before much longer, I’m going to feel differently about what we’re dealing with now.
I’m looking out my window at two of my neighbors, both seniors, at getting their mail. It’s obvious they know each other and have stopped to chat for a moment — thankfully from about 10 feet apart. What the hell with this natural world, making us behave this way just to keep from getting sick and possibly dying.
I told some colleagues before break started that I’d consider it a win if I made it all through our time off and only left the house five times or fewer. Not to walk the dog or get the mail, but actually hopped in the car and went somewhere. It feels like I brought this up in an earlier post already, but whatever. I started break getting myself plenty stocked up and still feel I’m ready to stay home and indoors for a good long while, but things are beginning to look like this is going to extend past a good long while and stretch into becoming a bad long while. Which probably means I’ve got at least one more grocery run at some point. Or would it be better to take advantage of all the take out or delivery choices from restaurants while that’s still a choice? I won’t be surprised if we eventually go into a statewide lockdown, but I think we still have time before we reach that benchmark. Is takeout worth the risk? Is it any less safe than going to a grocery store during off hours? Too many things to think about that really have never been a part of our lives before.
The biggest news has been the influx of email coming from the school district and my principal recently. Included in this has been the first indication we’ve been given of what we’ll be doing next week when we report back to work again. No kids, which is great, and all meetings and work keeping us as isolated as possible. I’ve been out for a week and haven’t gotten sick, so I’m hoping that means there isn’t any virus waiting for me in my classroom when I return, and since my room is at the end of a hallway and right by an exit, I should be able to minimize contact pretty effectively.
One of the worst things about this for me so far has been this holding pattern. When I get faced with some kind of a problem, I usually want it solved right away, and if I don’t know what I need to do to begin that process, it’s really frustrating. At least now I have some direction and will be able to keep my head productively occupied for the weekend.
In a way this week has been like a winter storm hitting, in the sense that you’re pretty much stuck at home because going anywhere, unless you really have to, isn’t an option. I’ve always enjoyed that to a degree, since I can keep to my introverted self and recharge in the quiet without feeling guilty about going out and doing something.
I have a feeling that before much longer, I’m going to feel differently about what we’re dealing with now.
Sunday, March 15, 2020
Pandemic Narrative, Part 2
Okay, first of all: We went from twenty-one to thirty-five cases overnight. I’ve seen too many pics and videos posted on social media showing how many people aren’t taking this seriously, and I want to scream at them for either being so ignorant, so irresponsible, or both. Those of you still out in the world acting like all of this is normal, or no big deal: What the hell exactly is wrong with you? Watch the news, any news, for five minutes, and then do the math. You are absolutely part of the problem. I've got two words for you: "Social" and "distancing."
If that rant didn’t make it clear enough, I’m definitely in the category of being cautious throughout this experience. It feels like right now I could prove to be overly-cautious, but we’ll see where we all are two weeks from today. I really don’t plan on leaving my house to go anywhere unless it’s necessary. I mean, yeah, I’ll walk the dog and get the mail, but hop in the car and drive somewhere? Not if I can avoid it. Most of the time I’m totally comfortable with this idea because I do have some extreme introvert superpowers, but I can see where it might be starting to get to me at a deeper level. Last night I dreamt I heard a knock at my front door, then saw the locks on the door begin glowing a bright blue, about the same shade as a natural gas flame. A woman was outside, someone I knew and under normal circumstances would have been perfectly happy to see and would invite inside (and in that way of dreams, I now have no idea who it was). I stood at the door not answering it though, and just watched as the locks glowed an increasingly brighter blue each time she knocked. Not hard to figure out what that all meant.
When it was time for the morning dog walk and we stepped out outside, the whole world felt empty, even for a Sunday morning. I reflexively felt cautious and defensive, like I was trying to make my way through the kind of post-apocalyptic landscape found in a movie, filled with hidden raiders or zombies or something. Even during our other shorter walks today, it’s still been eerie out there.
Later in the morning, the governor had a press conference announcing that schools statewide would be closed for eight school days, starting this coming Wednesday, which effectively extends spring break for my students by another week. It sounds like the plan is for these eight days to be used as planning for what almost certainly seems to be a time when distance learning will become a necessity. All I can say is thank God our governor was a teacher. It makes him all the more qualified to assemble and guide a team that will approach this problem from all the directions they can imagine: child nutrition, special needs, mental health concerns (and really, count yourself as blessed if you’re unaware of how frighteningly necessary that last point is). Of course there are enough viewpoints from all sides of the issue to make a decision like this a full-on Kobayashi Maru, but I’ll admit I was both relieved and inspired to learn how much thought had gone into the plan. For one point the governor directed the team toward — I believe it had to do with child care — he had said, if I can paraphrase, “find a way to address this problem that hasn’t been done before.”
I’m confident the team will do just that, because so many of them are educators. As much crap as we have to put up with about getting summers off (maybe not this year) and all the other usual teacher-bashing ignorance we have to endure, the defining points about teachers are that (a) we’re creative thinkers and (b) we get stuff done. I just hope that when the time comes for a distance learning plan to be implemented, and I believe it’s much more a when than an if, I’ll be able to manage my responsibilities from the comfort and relative safety of my home. It certainly won’t be my preferred option, especially since I have a class I really like this year and only one more trimester to work with them. However, I think when things come together however they will, we aren’t going to have another reasonable choice. We all have to work together at this.
If that rant didn’t make it clear enough, I’m definitely in the category of being cautious throughout this experience. It feels like right now I could prove to be overly-cautious, but we’ll see where we all are two weeks from today. I really don’t plan on leaving my house to go anywhere unless it’s necessary. I mean, yeah, I’ll walk the dog and get the mail, but hop in the car and drive somewhere? Not if I can avoid it. Most of the time I’m totally comfortable with this idea because I do have some extreme introvert superpowers, but I can see where it might be starting to get to me at a deeper level. Last night I dreamt I heard a knock at my front door, then saw the locks on the door begin glowing a bright blue, about the same shade as a natural gas flame. A woman was outside, someone I knew and under normal circumstances would have been perfectly happy to see and would invite inside (and in that way of dreams, I now have no idea who it was). I stood at the door not answering it though, and just watched as the locks glowed an increasingly brighter blue each time she knocked. Not hard to figure out what that all meant.
When it was time for the morning dog walk and we stepped out outside, the whole world felt empty, even for a Sunday morning. I reflexively felt cautious and defensive, like I was trying to make my way through the kind of post-apocalyptic landscape found in a movie, filled with hidden raiders or zombies or something. Even during our other shorter walks today, it’s still been eerie out there.
Later in the morning, the governor had a press conference announcing that schools statewide would be closed for eight school days, starting this coming Wednesday, which effectively extends spring break for my students by another week. It sounds like the plan is for these eight days to be used as planning for what almost certainly seems to be a time when distance learning will become a necessity. All I can say is thank God our governor was a teacher. It makes him all the more qualified to assemble and guide a team that will approach this problem from all the directions they can imagine: child nutrition, special needs, mental health concerns (and really, count yourself as blessed if you’re unaware of how frighteningly necessary that last point is). Of course there are enough viewpoints from all sides of the issue to make a decision like this a full-on Kobayashi Maru, but I’ll admit I was both relieved and inspired to learn how much thought had gone into the plan. For one point the governor directed the team toward — I believe it had to do with child care — he had said, if I can paraphrase, “find a way to address this problem that hasn’t been done before.”
I’m confident the team will do just that, because so many of them are educators. As much crap as we have to put up with about getting summers off (maybe not this year) and all the other usual teacher-bashing ignorance we have to endure, the defining points about teachers are that (a) we’re creative thinkers and (b) we get stuff done. I just hope that when the time comes for a distance learning plan to be implemented, and I believe it’s much more a when than an if, I’ll be able to manage my responsibilities from the comfort and relative safety of my home. It certainly won’t be my preferred option, especially since I have a class I really like this year and only one more trimester to work with them. However, I think when things come together however they will, we aren’t going to have another reasonable choice. We all have to work together at this.
Saturday, March 14, 2020
Pandemic Narrative, Part 1
I’m writing this in the minutes following the government declaring a national emergency in regards to the spread of COVID-19. So far this event has progressed at such a frightening rate, it occurred to me today that it might be a good idea to document the things that are happening to keep track of the pace. Of course, since this is my blog, much of what I write about here will be filtered through my own point of view. Not all of us will have the same experience as all of this rolls out. All I can offer is my own perspective.
Since I’ve done a lot of Lists of 10 here on the blog before, I think that might be a good format to follow for this as well — 10 points of what is either happening in the world in the moment or what I’m doing in my best efforts to cope and survive.
So, here are 10 observations or comments, in no particular order:
*To start off…I’ve been walking the face of this godforsaken planet for a wee bit longer than half a century now, and I’ve never seen anything like what is going on with this pandemic, and the worst part of it all is how it’s only getting started here. No wait, the worst thing might be that all the toilet paper and hand sanitizer and disinfectant wipes are sold out across the land. (I’m starting to think toilet paper might become currency when the virus apocalypse really kicks in.) No, hold on: The worst part of it is how our government is being operated by an incompetent collection of clown-shoes-wearing bumbles when we need experts in charge more than ever.
*A few weeks ago, I had won a pair of VIP tickets to see the Lumineers at Xcel Energy Center. I was excited because I really like the band, and have yet to take in a VIP experience of any sort. I even worked on growing out my beard for a few weeks, so it would be scraggly enough to have proof I was the fan of a band who played the kind of music Mumford and Sons would have if they’d grown up on the western plains or the Rocky Mountains instead of the UK. I’d hoped the virus spread would be slower and it would make sense to take the chance at going, but it didn’t work out. I was ready to give up my tickets right when I found out the concert had been postponed until September. Yay! Now I just need to stay alive until September. And I can get rid of the beard, which frankly is probably a trap for virus-tainted droplets anyway.
*On the subject of getting rid of the beard: The whole idea of not touching my face, which is proving a challenge, makes the simple act of washing my face feel like a spa day. Not that I know much about what a spa day would feel like, because what am I, Ryan Gosling? But face washing has never felt as luxurious as it does when you’re trying so hard not to touch it during the rest of the day.
*I started spring break today, officially. I have a doctor’s appointment this week — which was set pre-pandemic — and other than that I have no legitimate reason to leave my home. I mean, I’ll go outside to walk the dog and get the mail, but to go to a movie or a store, or meet someone for lunch? I may not go anywhere until I have to return to school at the end of break. Unless….
*Yesterday, Gov. Tim Walz declared a statewide peacetime emergency. He did not, however, close the schools. About ten states have, but we aren’t one of them…yet. It’s my hope that by the time my spring break ends, he’ll wise up and rectify this. You see, I know what it’s like in a school. It isn’t, “Oh, it’s just a bunch of kids and they aren’t the ones getting sick.” It’s the parents who come through. It’s ALL OF THE ADULTS who work there, many of whom travel from building to building, sometimes during the same day. And as for those kids, even if they aren’t typically getting sick, they’re very effective carriers. Generally, I like to think my immune system is pretty robust; for example, I’ve only had about one week worth of colds in the past two and a half years. But this new virus is a big unknown, and I’d rather not try taking it on. As strong as my immune system might be, I spend my day with coughers and wipers and scratchers and pickers. I’ve been coughed on in such close proximity I’ve been able to taste them. I know how bad the disease vector of the public school is first hand, so I know how much potential difference it could make to get it off the game board for a few weeks. Because social distancing? In a classroom? No. It’s not possible.
*There is more food in my house right now than there probably ever has been during my entire adult life. I usually shop a week at a time, which can leave my kitchen not unlike Tyler Durden’s by the end of the week. I am fully stocked now though, and I plan to ration. Not down to anything ridiculous like three Cheez-Its per hour, but a whole lot less snacking and a whole lot more of respecting serving sizes. I could even wind up dropping some weight because of this, which would give me a nice self-esteem boost to enjoy for the three weeks I’d have until the virus kills me off. Until then, I’m fully prepared to settle in and let my introverted superpowers carry me through as far as they can.
*I’m filling time by watching TV, which is becoming a trigger. I often have news on as background noise, but there’s nothing about that right now that isn’t scary. Even normal TV is scary though, when you see people touch their faces, or shake hands, or hug, or high five, or fist bump, or sneeze, or cough, or wipe their nose, or not wash their hands long enough…I’m sure you get the picture. I also plan on reading a lot, which will be easy since I have a formidable To Be Read pile. This is a part of it (full-disclosure: I’ve already read about 25% of these, but just don’t have anywhere else to keep them).
*I’m also going to use the time to get some writing done. I’ve got one book I’m starting and another I’m preparing to revise. I have to say some state-mandated weeks off from school would help quite a bit with getting things done for the other job.
*I’m honestly torn between wanting to keep myself as hyper-informed about what’s happening as I can so I know what we’re all up against, and wanting to just watch The Office and rock out to old Styx albums to pretend the world is still a normal place. It makes me wonder what it will be like afterward, however long it takes us to achieve afterward, when we’ll be able to put all of our previous concerns into a new perspective.
*Today I plan on dusting off the Xbox and starting an open world game I’ve never played before but have had lying around for the longest time. An open world game is one where you just kind of wander around through the expansive setting of the game, interacting with different characters, completing missions and quests, and just living your game life.
I’m pretty sure there won’t be any scary viruses in there.
Since I’ve done a lot of Lists of 10 here on the blog before, I think that might be a good format to follow for this as well — 10 points of what is either happening in the world in the moment or what I’m doing in my best efforts to cope and survive.
So, here are 10 observations or comments, in no particular order:
*To start off…I’ve been walking the face of this godforsaken planet for a wee bit longer than half a century now, and I’ve never seen anything like what is going on with this pandemic, and the worst part of it all is how it’s only getting started here. No wait, the worst thing might be that all the toilet paper and hand sanitizer and disinfectant wipes are sold out across the land. (I’m starting to think toilet paper might become currency when the virus apocalypse really kicks in.) No, hold on: The worst part of it is how our government is being operated by an incompetent collection of clown-shoes-wearing bumbles when we need experts in charge more than ever.
*A few weeks ago, I had won a pair of VIP tickets to see the Lumineers at Xcel Energy Center. I was excited because I really like the band, and have yet to take in a VIP experience of any sort. I even worked on growing out my beard for a few weeks, so it would be scraggly enough to have proof I was the fan of a band who played the kind of music Mumford and Sons would have if they’d grown up on the western plains or the Rocky Mountains instead of the UK. I’d hoped the virus spread would be slower and it would make sense to take the chance at going, but it didn’t work out. I was ready to give up my tickets right when I found out the concert had been postponed until September. Yay! Now I just need to stay alive until September. And I can get rid of the beard, which frankly is probably a trap for virus-tainted droplets anyway.
*On the subject of getting rid of the beard: The whole idea of not touching my face, which is proving a challenge, makes the simple act of washing my face feel like a spa day. Not that I know much about what a spa day would feel like, because what am I, Ryan Gosling? But face washing has never felt as luxurious as it does when you’re trying so hard not to touch it during the rest of the day.
*I started spring break today, officially. I have a doctor’s appointment this week — which was set pre-pandemic — and other than that I have no legitimate reason to leave my home. I mean, I’ll go outside to walk the dog and get the mail, but to go to a movie or a store, or meet someone for lunch? I may not go anywhere until I have to return to school at the end of break. Unless….
*Yesterday, Gov. Tim Walz declared a statewide peacetime emergency. He did not, however, close the schools. About ten states have, but we aren’t one of them…yet. It’s my hope that by the time my spring break ends, he’ll wise up and rectify this. You see, I know what it’s like in a school. It isn’t, “Oh, it’s just a bunch of kids and they aren’t the ones getting sick.” It’s the parents who come through. It’s ALL OF THE ADULTS who work there, many of whom travel from building to building, sometimes during the same day. And as for those kids, even if they aren’t typically getting sick, they’re very effective carriers. Generally, I like to think my immune system is pretty robust; for example, I’ve only had about one week worth of colds in the past two and a half years. But this new virus is a big unknown, and I’d rather not try taking it on. As strong as my immune system might be, I spend my day with coughers and wipers and scratchers and pickers. I’ve been coughed on in such close proximity I’ve been able to taste them. I know how bad the disease vector of the public school is first hand, so I know how much potential difference it could make to get it off the game board for a few weeks. Because social distancing? In a classroom? No. It’s not possible.
*There is more food in my house right now than there probably ever has been during my entire adult life. I usually shop a week at a time, which can leave my kitchen not unlike Tyler Durden’s by the end of the week. I am fully stocked now though, and I plan to ration. Not down to anything ridiculous like three Cheez-Its per hour, but a whole lot less snacking and a whole lot more of respecting serving sizes. I could even wind up dropping some weight because of this, which would give me a nice self-esteem boost to enjoy for the three weeks I’d have until the virus kills me off. Until then, I’m fully prepared to settle in and let my introverted superpowers carry me through as far as they can.
*I’m filling time by watching TV, which is becoming a trigger. I often have news on as background noise, but there’s nothing about that right now that isn’t scary. Even normal TV is scary though, when you see people touch their faces, or shake hands, or hug, or high five, or fist bump, or sneeze, or cough, or wipe their nose, or not wash their hands long enough…I’m sure you get the picture. I also plan on reading a lot, which will be easy since I have a formidable To Be Read pile. This is a part of it (full-disclosure: I’ve already read about 25% of these, but just don’t have anywhere else to keep them).
*I’m also going to use the time to get some writing done. I’ve got one book I’m starting and another I’m preparing to revise. I have to say some state-mandated weeks off from school would help quite a bit with getting things done for the other job.
*I’m honestly torn between wanting to keep myself as hyper-informed about what’s happening as I can so I know what we’re all up against, and wanting to just watch The Office and rock out to old Styx albums to pretend the world is still a normal place. It makes me wonder what it will be like afterward, however long it takes us to achieve afterward, when we’ll be able to put all of our previous concerns into a new perspective.
*Today I plan on dusting off the Xbox and starting an open world game I’ve never played before but have had lying around for the longest time. An open world game is one where you just kind of wander around through the expansive setting of the game, interacting with different characters, completing missions and quests, and just living your game life.
I’m pretty sure there won’t be any scary viruses in there.
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