I haven’t done a Big Block of Cheese Day post in some time now, mostly because I haven’t done any posts in a long time, at least before May started. You can always search old posts if you’re curious about reference I’m admittedly misusing behind the origin of the name, but in a nutshell — a Big Block of Cheese Day post is when I have a lot of small ideas of things to write about, but none seem like enough to sustain an entire post themselves. So, I just throw together a collection of shorter, partially developed ideas instead. Which is what we’re doing tonight, because I don’t really have ONE solid idea to lean on, and I’m kind of tired here.
The Perfect Night
This was suggested by a well-meaning friend. There are far too many directions to go in describing a perfect night, but I’ll keep things smooth and cool here. Since it is my birthday in a couple of days, and all I really want out of a birthday anymore is a day when nothing that sucks happens, I’ll describe what I would hope a birthday night would be like. It would be a Friday, so my head would be occupied during the day and I wouldn't be thinking too much about what might happen later in the evening. Plus there are few reliefs like getting to the end of a Friday in an elementary school without some giant pile of crap hanging over your head and threatening the peace of your weekend. I’d leave after traveling through a few hallway pickup conversation pockets long enough to allow me a feeling of closure for the week, then I’d drive home with all good songs on the radio. There’d be something good for dinner already waiting that I wouldn’t have to cook or order. (Tragic side note: I realized too late I arranged for Sammich Week to end on my birthday, and damn it if I’m not already kind of tired of sammiches every night and I still have two nights to go and one has to be on my birthday.) I’d get home, bring Freddie to the park to pee on his favorite tree, then bring him home and enjoy a nice, calm, peaceful night with spring weather that’s favorable enough for me to open the windows and enjoy the breeze. I’m a man of few wants, it seems.
Reaction Videos
During the pandemic, I discovered a guilty pleasure on YouTube. There’s a whole community of people who post videos of themselves reacting the classic songs they’ve never heard before the first time they listen. It’s like vicariously hearing a song for the first time again. If you did deep enough, you can find some favorites. At least I have.
Behaviors I Should Justifiably Be Ridiculed For
*I’ve set up everything about Venmo except connecting a bank because I’m paranoid about my money disappearing into the ether. This means I still write checks sometimes.
*I still get a newspaper delivered to my house every day, even if most of the time I only read the comics and do the Sudoku puzzle.
*I still wake up early in the summer.
*I don’t stream music. I listen to either the radio or CDs in my car, and I listen to an iPod plugged into a speaker dock in the house. I live in abject terror of the day that iPod stops working.
*I have immediate access to four streaming services, but most of the TV I watch is either reruns of The Office on cable or replays of Marvel Movies on cable when I find one on.
*I keep books beside my bed even though I fall asleep every night in about five minutes.
I feel that’s probably enough for now.
Summertime Adventure Suggestions
I have a short list of things I’d like to do this summer, provided they’d be safe. Several are things I haven’t done before and would like to try. I won’t list them here…for fear of encouragement. I’ve found that if I ever seek out advice or suggestions online, the responses I get are frequently reflections of the people suggesting them. This makes sense because they’re sharing their own enthusiasms, but I don’t know if that’s the way such suggestions should be made. Maybe if we ever give advice to each other about such things, we should think more about what the other person would like instead of sharing what we like. For example: The idea of most friends randomly setting me up with someone they know is a horrible @#%%^&! idea. Most of the time these set ups come from a place of, “Hey, your single, she’s single, why not?” I could write a book called Why Not, and chapter one would probably be about how random people don’t just connect because neither of them is in a relationship. If someone tried to set me up and had reasons why, well, maybe. But just, “Hey, you’re both kind of desperate. What do you honestly have to lose here?” No. Pass.
And Finally, The Poison of Social Media
I wish I could leave it all behind. I barely use Instagram, but really only to see what the younger people in my life are doing. Facebook is more about friends and family, especially the ones who live long distances away. Twitter is good for the news. But really, all of them, in some way, make me feel like crap. Just like life was so much better before I started carrying a damned cell phone, life was quieter before social media was a thing. I kind of miss being the holdout sometimes.
Anyway. That seems like enough. Enjoy whatever you cut away from this particular Big Block of Cheese. (And I apologize for not having the wakefulness tonight that would be required for careful proofreading. Sometimes in May, you post just to get the post up.)
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