The following routine settled into semi-permanence around mid-October last year….
5:44 AM: He’s moving. He’s groaning and stretching! Those are the signals I’ve been waiting for! It’s time to jump off this recliner I’ve claimed as my own and jump on the bed to stretch out over his chest and demand pets and scratches while my tail creates a light breeze near his head that goes unappreciated during the colder seasons of the year!
6:02 AM: I’ve received an appropriate amount of pets and scratches, so I will go lie down beside him and start playing with his fingers as if they are Snausages.
6:13 AM: The TV weatherperson who reminds me so much of a golden retriever is talking now, so he’s getting up!
6:14 AM: WHERE IS MY YELLOW DINOSAUR I MUST RUN SEVERAL LAPS AROUND THE LIVING ROOM WITH HIM IN MY MOUTH
6:15 AM: Okay, his shoes are on now so we can go outside! I love outside so dearly! So many smells for me to smell!
6:30 AM: I am incapable of describing the perfection that is breakfast. Why would anyone ever want to eat anything other than breakfast food?
6:30:24: I wonder if there’s any peanut butter to be found in the kitchen this morning. I should probably stand here and stare up at him as he works the Sudoku just in case.
6:45 AM: Okay. TV is fine. But I will stretch out on his lap instead of watch.
7:00 AM: He’s getting ready for the day! I must follow him to the bedroom while he cleans up and gets dressed in case there is guarding to be done.
7:04 AM: Guarding is not exciting, and he seems okay. Perhaps there is a patch of sunlight waiting for me somewhere.
8:00 AM: Goodness, that was warm. Perhaps I’ll go back to bed.
10:30 AM: It’s outside time again! Outside! All the smells!
10:35 AM: My time in bed feels incomplete somehow. I need more time to achieve closure.
12:00 Noon: AHHH IT’S TIME TO WALK WE’RE GOING TO THE PARK AND MOLLY MIGHT BE THERE AND WAGS MIGHT BE THERE AND AHHHH THE PARK
1:00 PM: Hmm, it seems that tricky sunshine is trying to outwit me for some reason and has conveniently migrated to my blanket fort. Perhaps I will go lie there for hours.
4:00 PM: WALK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4:30 PM: I need a drink and a very short nap, because….
5:00 PM: SUPPER!!!! MY OTHER FAVORITE WORD OF ALL THE WORDS!!!!!
6:00 PM: Hmm. He hasn’t eaten his supper yet. I believe this situation requires vigilance. I will quietly growl at the door just in case someone carrying a bag of food tries to break into MY house. If they do, I can usually scare them away so completely they set the food down to make a more efficient escape.
6:30 PM: Oh, sweet. These pillows on the living room couch are still here in the same spot where I’ve kept them for these nearly three years.
9:00 PM: Hmm…? Was that… I swore I heard my… yep, he’s got my leash. *Yawn/Stretch/Yawn* Okay, yeah, yeah, sure. Outside. Woo-hoo. Let’s get this done.
9:30 PM: I know it’s dark, and his demeanor gives away precisely how tired he is right now, but I feel strongly that I’m owed a bedtime snack before I will even consider settling in for the evening.
9:38 PM: Okay. Blanket 1, check. Blanket 2, check. Bear, bird, and taco — all present. Now I can sleep.
5:44 AM: He’s moving. He’s groaning and stretching! Those are the signals I’ve been waiting for....
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